Questionnaire About Race & Me

My good blogging friend and real life friend Kylie tagged me in this fun post with questions about how things work in our marriage/relationship. I hope you enjoy getting to know Race and I a little better!  

PHOTO CREDIT: LAUREN BRIMLEY

{Side note: Race and I really need more pictures of just the two of us! This is from a year and a half ago!}

1. Who is your man?
Race W Ashby

2. How long have you been together?
Since we started dating: 3 years and a couple of months

3. Dating/Engaged/Married?
Officially dating February 26, 2010 // Engaged May 27, 2010 // Married September 3rd, 2010 {Pretty fast, eh?}

4. How old is your man?
He just turned 25! 

You or your man?

1. Who eats more?
I would say I do. Race eats WAY more sweets but not very much when it comes to actual meals. And since I've been pregnant/breastfeeding I eat A LOT. 

2. Who said "I love you" first?
This is embarrassing but Race and I actually don't know. He says that I said it first and I say that he said it first. Haha. I honestly can't remember the exact moment it happened. I guess I might need to go back and read some journal entries about it! 

3. Who weighs more?
Race. Although when I was pregnant I think we were pretty dang close to the same!

4. Who sings better?
Definitely Race. I'm not very good and I'm embarrassed to sing so that doesn't help at all. 

5. Who's older?
Race by a little bit under two years. 

6. Who's smarter?
Race says it totally depends on the subject. I would say we're pretty close in smartness although Race is a WAY better writer. 

7. Who's temper is worse?
Mine. Definitely. Race is pretty level headed but I get mad and I don't let it go until we talk it out and find a solution. 

8. Who does the laundry?
Almost always me. Race will switch it over for me when I ask him to but I don't mind doing the laundry for the most part and I'm really particular about how things get folded and put away so I just take care of it. 

9. Who does the dishes?
It used to be pretty even but I would say that now I do them more. Race has made a goal to always do the dishes before playing video games though so that might change! {Also I should give Race credit for the housework he does that aren't in these questions. Race ALWAYS takes the garbage out. I have taken it out MAYBE five times since we've gotten married. Also Race almost always does the sweeping, mopping and vacuuming. He's awesome!} 

10. Who sleeps on the right side of the bed?
If you're facing the bed then I do. We always sleep the opposite of our normal when we aren't in our own bed though. I don't know why but it always happens.

11. Who's feet are bigger?
Race's. Although if mine grow every pregnancy and decide not to shrink back to their normal size then I might just catch up! Haha. Not really but I'd be close. Although nevermind I don't know how shoe sizes translate between genders...

12. Who's hair is longer?
Mine. Thank goodness.  

13. Who's better with the computer?
Race. I know just enough to get by. 

14. Who pays the bills?
Both but mostly Race. I am always in charge of the phone bill but Race usually takes care of the rest. 

15. Who cooks dinner?
Almost always me. Race is convinced he doesn't know how to cook anything other than heating up a corn dog in the microwave. I'm sure that's not the case but he's at work til late every night anyway so it just works for me to cook. 

16. Who drives when you are together?
Race almost always does. I actually really don't like driving so I won't do it unless he's not feeling good or something. 

17. Who pays when you go out to dinner?
Usually Race but we have joint accounts so it's not like it really makes a difference. Race is learning a skill that my dad has {that I love} where as soon as the waiter/waitress brings your bill you have your card ready for them so that you aren't waiting around all night for them to come around again. I just like it because you can stay and chat for however long but when you are ready to leave you don't have to try and get their attention. 

18. Who's the most stubborn?
I think that I am more often stubborn but Race definitely has a few things that he is really stubborn about. 

19. Who is the first one to admit when they're wrong?
I would say we're pretty evenly split on this one. Although we both say that we are first to admit when we are wrong more than the other one. Haha. At night though it's usually me because I can't fall asleep mad at Race. I just have to cuddle with him and I don't cuddle when I'm mad so I just have to decide to get over it and say sorry. 

20. Whose parents do you see more?
Neither now that we live in Idaho. When we visit we try to spend equal time with both of our families. When we lived in AZ it was definitely my family. They were closer and there were a lot more baby blessings and family things to go to. 

21. Who kissed who first?
Race kissed me first. 

22. Who asked who out?
Race asked me out after inviting himself over bearing the gift of ice cream. 

23. What did you do?
On our first date we had a pirate theme because we may or may not have watched a pirated movie. So we went to Michael's and got crayons and candles to make pirate candles and then we went to Target to get some sparkling cider {the bottles were also for the pirate candles} and then we picked up Subway for dinner and headed over to Race's apartment to watch Avatar and make our awesome pirate candles. 

24. Who's more sensitive?
Definitely me. I think Race has cried maybe twice since I've known him. 

25. Who's taller?
Race. He is 5'10" and I am {almost} 5'1" 

26. Who is more indecisive?
Usually me. Although when it comes to picking something to watch off of Netflix or something Race can browse for hours. I'm not sure if that's because he is indecisive or because he just enjoys browsing. Hmmm.

27. Who has more siblings?
Me. I have eight brothers and two sisters and Race has two sisters and two brothers. 

28. Who wears the pants in the relationship?
Race says that he does and I would probably agree. 

29. Who has the best husband ever?
That would be me! 

And now I tag Kara of Not a Couple's Blog and Alexis of Alexis Laughs and anyone else who would like to do this because I would love to read your answers! It's fun to see how different everyone's relationships are. 

Profound Points in Psychology

I am a Psychology major {You can all laugh or get out your psychologist/psychiatrist jokes out now ;] I will probably never be a psychologist or psychiatrist but people still make jokes or weird noises whenever I say I am a Psychology major. Haha. Does anyone else get funny reactions when they say their major or their career?}.
There is a lot that I love about Psychology and also a lot that really bothers me. I am sure that every discipline is somewhat like that.
Anyway, today when reading my textbook {Human Motivation, Robert E. Franken} I read something that I really liked. It said:

"You fall in love through your actions and you can stay in love through your actions."

"Staying in love depends on making the decision that you love someone and that you are willing to invest the time and energy necessary to stay in the relationship."

"It is ultimately your decision whether you stay in love or fall out of love.

It is so sad to hear stories about people who got divorced because they "fell out of love" with each other. I love that these quotes put the decision right on Race and I. And I am so glad that we made the decision to stay in love with each other for eternity. I really like the first quote because it is a reminder to do things every day/week/month/year to stay in love. So, I think that our goal for the next year {and the rest of eternity} will be to find things that we can do for each other every day that say "I love you."

Somewhere Over the Rainbow

"Somewhere Over the Rainbow" is a song I used to {goofily} sing all the time {with my best friend/sister-in-law}. In fact, we sang it in front of Race the first time I met Race. Haha. Good time! Anyway, later it turned into a phrase I doodled all over my notes in school. When I doodled it all over things it would make me think of all the things I am looking forward to in the future. Things that are "over the rainbow". This phrase has come to mean so much to me and has come to encompass all of my dreams and wishes.

Here are some of the things that I am looking forward to "Somewhere Over the Rainbow":

Graduating college {oh so close!}

Having more time {okay I don't know if this one ever really happens...someday!}
Raising cute babies!

Buying a house and making it our home.

Taking the time to teach our children the gospel.

Learning to SEW {totally working on this one now!}

Learning to cook healthy meals for my family {and ones that Race actually likes even though they're healthy}.

Buying a cute dog to be best friends with Race, me, and our children.

Going on vacations with Race and with our future children.

Making memories together {we are definitely already doing this}.

Being pregnant and wearing cute maternity clothes with a cute lil belly {Is this a weird one? Haha. Probably but since I haven't experienced it yet I can be excited for now}!

Going to a live temple session in Manti or Salt Lake City.

These are just some of the many wonderful things

I look forward to in our future. But for now I

will enjoy our simple, school filled lives.

Being married is a blast. There is so much

fun now and so much fun to look forward to.

What a wonderful time to be alive!

What do you all look forward to Somewhere Over the Rainbow? And what are you enjoying in your lives now?

Double Rainbow anyone?!

An Emotional Morning

It's been a crazy morning: I have cuddled in bed with my husband, gotten in a fight with my husband {like I've said our marriage isn't perfect}, made up with my husband, gotten a call about a job I applied for, rushed to an interview before class, got the job, missed my class, realized the job will not help cover all of our expenses, gotten really emotional and cried, recognized the hand of my Heavenly Father in my life, prayed, cried some more, called my husband with good news, cried some more, prayed some more, read my scriptures, and then decided I needed to share my experience {that's where I'm at right now}.

Now all of that in a little bit more detail:

Over the summer I quit my job. It was stressful, too many hours, and my boss was emotionally abusive. It was a good thing. I had worked really hard for the past year and come home crying about the way I was treated as well as the way the children I was nannying were being treated by their mom, my boss. It was a very good decision to quit my job and I don't regret it. However, I HATE job hunting and did not try very hard over the summer to get a job. I worked for about a month nannying/babysitting various families in Flagstaff and it helped to keep us afloat. Race worked a TON over the summer at his on campus job and cleaning and that's what really kept us afloat.

Cue school starting. As I've mentioned before school is stressful and hard and makes my life a lot busier {it has been getting better though}. Since school has started I have actually been doing better about applying for a job and job searching but nothing had come of it...until today.

Earlier this week I took an application into the office that Race works in because he had said that they were really busy and needed the extra help. When I talked to his boss it sounded like they needed someone to cover times other than when I was available so I didn't think anything would come of it. She did say that she would pass my application on to other offices in the building. She did and yesterday I got a call while I was in class asking if I could work Tuesdays and Thursdays from 12-5pm. I called back as soon as I got out of class and left a message saying that I had class until 12:25 so I couldn't start right at noon but I would be able to get there by 12:35 at the latest if that's when they needed me. I got a call back this morning.

This was after getting frustrated with Race about money stuff and how stressed out he's been. Who gets frustrated at someone for being stressed...when they're stressed?! Apparently I do. I was being ridiculous and mean and not appreciating Race for all that he does for me and for our little family. I wanted him to just be happy even though things have been really stressful for him. I wasn't being understanding at all. {I feel like I should edit all of that out but I am not going to because it was part of the emotional morning. Please don't hate me for being a crazy lady though!}

After getting frustrated at ridiculous things I apologized to Race, drove him to work, and we went to look for the guy {George} who had called me on the phone so that hopefully I could meet with him and convince him that I deserve the job. We couldn't find him so I headed home after giving Race a kiss. About an hour later is when the call came. George asked if I could meet with him right away for an interview. I headed straight over to Race's work {40 minutes before my class was supposed to start} and  met with George. And I got the job! I was really excited. I dropped by Race's office and gave him a thumbs up signaling I had gotten on the job. He was on the phone so we didn't get to talk.

On my way out the door I looked at my watch to see that I had ten minutes to get to my class that is all the way across campus. That's a twenty minute bus ride plus a ten minute walk. There was no way I was going to make it on time. Especially not on time for the quiz at the beginning of class. I super stress about being late so instead of rushing to make it I gave up...{I know...bad me}. Anyway, as I was walking to my apartment instead of rushing to my class I decided to calculate about how much I'll be making a month at my new job. I was only guaranteed 8-10 hours a week at minimum wage so that put me at not very much money and much less than we need to pay for rent and our phone bill and food and other important things. I started crying. I had missed class because of an interview for a job that wasn't even going to cover everything that we needed. I was upset and mad and really frustrated.

I got home and called my mom {because that's what I do when I'm frustrated}. I talked to her and she reminded me {like she always does} that this may be a blessing in disguise. That we may need to learn from actually having to scrimp when it comes to money {we never really had to do that with my old job}. While I was on the phone with my mom I decided to check Race's NAU student account to see if he had received his financial aid yet {he had to redo our taxes so he was way behind of receiving financial aid and was convinced that he wasn't going to get anything}. I have been checking every day since school started to see if he has gotten anything. He has been thinking that I am ridiculous because nothing was going to come. But, lo and behold, today, in his account sat a $5550 Pell Grant {plus some other loans that we declined}. This was exactly what we needed. It was exactly what I needed today. I told my mom and told her that I needed to call Race. She reminded me that before I did ANYTHING else I needed to get down on my knees and thank Heavenly Father for this blessing. So I did. And I cried. I do not know how Heavenly Father knows the EXACT right time to give us the things that we need but he does. His timing is absolutely perfect and I am so grateful for a Heavenly Father who shows me that he is watching and he cares about ME and my husband and our itty bitty family. It was such a nice feeling to call Race and let him know that we are going to be okay and that Heavenly Father notices us. His response: "We need to double up on our scripture reading and praying!" I love my husband. And I assure you that we will be doubling up on all of that and more!

I just prayed yesterday that I would be able to recognize Heavenly Father's hand in my life every day and I think today was a really good start. :] I know it's not always things as big as $5550 but I know that Heavenly Father is taking care of us every single day and if we look for his hand {whether it comes in the form of service from others, personal revelation, or anything else} in our lives we will see it.

I am grateful for this emotional morning.

Loving the Married Life {Happy Anniversary! Post}

Race and I have been married for one year {and six days, our actual anniversary was September 3rd}! Our marriage isn't always perfect {is anyone's?} and it isn't always easy but it has been the most wonderful thing for both of us. This past year has been INCREDIBLE. {I'm speaking for Race but I'm sure that he agrees!}

On our anniversary mini-vacation  Race and I talked about all the things that we love about being married. Here are some of the things we came up with:

• We love cuddling all the time, giving each other "bum squeezes"*, waking up next to each other every morning. 
• We love seeing TONS of movies together {we got to basically every midnight showing}, finding new shows together, reading books together. 
• We love decorating our home{s} together, cleaning together {let's be honest we don't love cleaning but together is better than alone}, and moving from apartment to apartment together {and eventually into a home}. 
• We love celebrating holidays, birthdays, and accomplishments together. 
• We love planning for the future while enjoying every moment of the present. 
• We love  supporting each other 100% in all that we do. 
• Most importantly, we love that we never have to be alone and we always have someone to talk to about the good, {the great!}, the bad, and the ugly in our lives.

One year has flown by. {Less than} a year from now we will both be graduated with our Bachelor's degrees and trying to figure out where we're headed next. Graduate school? Law school? Jobs? Babies? New town/city? New car? New home? There are so many unknowns but we can't wait to plan and change plans as our lives change. And the best part is we get to do it together! I love being married to my best friend. And I love that it is for eternity.

Here are some fun pictures from the last year of our marriage!{Also, in trying to find posts about things that we did this past year I realized that I didn't post about SO many things! I might have to write a list of posts to catch up on so that I can have these memories somewhere other than in a folder of pictures on my computer.} Sorry for the picture overload. Oh, and I don't think any of them are edited {other than some Instagram} because my computer decided not to save my edits...Oh well. Also, they are not in chronological order although I did try to somewhat organize them...

September 3rd, 2010

We enjoyed lots of kisses in the past year.

We made lots of goofy faces! 

 We enjoyed going to church together {in various wards since we rarely stayed in town on the weekends}

We enjoyed nature together.

We enjoyed date nights.

We enjoyed moving into and decorating two apartments together.

First TINY apartment:

Second larger apartment. :]

We enjoyed romantic dinner dates at home and at restaurants.

 We enjoyed dressing alike {okay this probably really only happened this once}

We enjoyed being silly together.

We enjoyed celebrating holidays and birthdays together and carrying on traditions as well as creating our own traditions.

We enjoyed vacationing together. 

We enjoyed welcoming lots of cute nieces and nephews to our family.

We enjoyed going to midnight showings of movies together.

That was a weird one to end on but it was hard to get those all organized so that's the way it's going to stay! So I'm sorry for the TONS of pictures. I hope you weren't too bored. There are so many more that I want to post but I think I'll just split them up into posts of things that I missed writing about in the past. Anyway, enough rambling! I love looking back on our year and seeing how much fun we have had together. Having someone to do big and small adventures with all the time is the best! I'm excited to see what this year brings and can't wait to share all of our adventures with our new blogging friends. :]

Anniversary Weekend Part 1

Our anniversary weekend was WONDERFUL! We started out the weekend by packing up the car and heading to beautiful Lake Powell. We had tons of snacks, good food to cook over a fire, and our books to read while we cuddled. The weather was perfect, the drive was really nice and we got out earlier than planned because Race's boss was really sweet and let him leave an hour and a half early as she wished him a happy anniversary. :] We headed out after promising each other we wouldn't bring up stressful topics for the weekend {monies, school, jobs, etc.} and enjoyed good conversations and good music in the car. We headed to the Lone Rock camp site {just across the Utah border} and immediately got our truck stuck in the sand. Luckily, a nice family of six or so cute, blond hair blue-eyed boys {from about age 4 to age 15} came up and helped us push the truck and then had their dad come up and pull us out in his truck. Then we set up camp {a little ways away from everyone else} and made our fire. We cooked a yummy dinner of hot dogs {I only like them cooked over a fire} and then had a delicious dessert of s'mores. After dinner and dessert we spent the rest of the evening cuddling and reading and doing other fun things. We went to bed earlier than we would have if we were at home because we knew we would have to get up early in order to get our jet ski from the rental place and spend as much time as possible on the lake.

We got up early on Saturday, got the truck out of the rest of the sand without getting stuck {yay!}, and then headed into Page to get our jet ski! We got into town early so we grabbed some breakfast and sat in the truck trying not to fall asleep! We got the jet ski right at 8:00 am and were talked through how to work it since neither of us had ridden one before. We headed to the State Line unloading zone and successfully got the jet ski into the water without damaging it. I was a scaredy cat and couldn't drive the car out of the water afterwards though {we have a stick shift and I was scared the truck would just roll back into the water before I could gun it back up the hill}. So I stood with the jet ski in the water while Race parked the truck and ran back down to me. We quickly figured out how to ride it and headed straight back to our campsite for provisions {TONS of Mountain Dews for Race and some lemonade and water for me plus lots of snacks}. We spent the ENTIRE day on the jet ski and it was so much fun. We rode it super fast in the super choppy water {it was a busy weekend being labor day and all} but didn't crash it. And when we wanted to take a break we would just turn it off and stretch out on the jet ski and/or jump in the water to cool off. It was the most perfect day. We just got to enjoy each other's company without any interruptions {no phones, video games, TV, computers, etc.}. I think we need days like that more often because it's so nice to actually talk and get to know each other again without modern day distractions. 

Don't mind my makeupless face in all of these photos and my weeeeird bangs {jet ski wind does that to you}.

We returned the jet ski on time {after spending almost an hour in traffic} and headed to our campsite to clear out. We didn't get stuck in the sand but had to walk all our stuff further to our truck. It was good exercise though. Haha. After loading up we headed home to Flagstaff. We were EXHAUSTED but decided to head down to the valley on Saturday night so that we wouldn't have to drive down early in the morning on Sunday. The rest of the weekend was spent doing a mini family reunion with my immediate family that has grown so much recently with marriages and new babies. It was a great weekend and I will post more on the rest of it so look forward to: hopefully a video of some cool stuff we did {still trying to figure out how to make a video...}, cool sewing projects, cute pictures of the most adorable babies, and just more fun family stuff. Also, I will have another outfit post coming up soon so get excited!

Thanks AGAIN to my guest bloggers! They made my weekend so much more relaxing and they all shared the sweetest stories. Go and check them out in the posts below!

P.S. I'm excited for Zooey Deschanel in New Girl. I'm not sure what the show is about but Zooey is ADORABLE! Is anyone else excited? I already know I will be falling in love with ALL of her clothes.

Me & My Husband {Twelfth Edition}

Continuing from this post: this post.

Question 12: Favorite part of the day and least favorite part of the day. {Can be anything}


I'll get the bad out of the way and then move on to the good. :]


First off there wasn't anything absolutely terrible. Mostly there were just some funny, weird things that happened. 


1. A bug flew up my nose right before we headed into the temple {while we were doing pictures, 13th picture down, here}.
2. Race was in the process of some crazy tooth surgery and was actually missing a tooth at the time of our wedding. He had a flipper tooth at the time which made kissing over the altar and for pictures a LITTLE bit weird. It was still good though. And, he has a tooth now {not a flipper} so kissing is grrreat! 
3. We got stuck in traffic on our way to our honeymoon destination! 


I think that's all. Those are such small things compared to what a WONDERFUL day it was. 


And now to the good things:


1. Sitting and talking quietly together in the temple before entering the sealing room. 
2. Getting advice from the temple president on love and marriage. 
3. Entering the sealing room to see the faces of so many people we love there to support us. 
4. Giggling lots while taking pictures. 
5. Not being stressed about ANYTHING once I saw Race.6. Making sweet promises to each other for all eternity.

Pretty much everything about our day was good. We didn't have our reception the night of our wedding which we loved. I think that it really helped me not to be stressed about anything. And we were glad that we got to head straight to our honeymoon destination after a quick brunch. It was a good day! And we are coming up on one year next weekend. I can't wait! We are headed to Lake Powell for the weekend and then might be ending it in the valley with my family for a mini family reunion. It will be a good weekend. :]


Oh, for that weekend I was THINKING about having two or three guest posters. I just wanted to see if anyone was interested...and IF anyone is then they should give me some tips on how I would go about setting up a guest post...because I have never had a guest poster or been a guest poster. So, let me know. And have a WONDERFUL weekend!

Edit: I think I now have enough guest posters for next weekend but I LOVE the idea of guest posting and would love for anyone who is interested in doing it at some point to let me know so that next time I'm away I can ask you! You can email me at emsmilesss {at} gmail {dot} com. Thanks so much everyone!

Me & My Husband {Eleventh Edition}

Continuing from this post.

Question 11: Your song and/or the first song you danced to at your wedding: share a music video or lyrics if you can!

Race is super into music and had quite a few songs that reminded him of me. We chose one of those songs for our dance but honestly we didn't even end up having our "first dance" until our reception after all of the guests were gone. I think our true first dance was in our itty bitty first kitchen {it was really a hallway with a tiny sink and stove} while I was trying to cook Race dinner and getting frustrated. He pulled me away from everything and danced with me to no music. It was romantic and one of my favorite memories of being married. Mmm I love that boy! Anyway, the song we chose to dance to at our wedding was "If My Heart Was a House" by Owl City. 

Other songs we considered {some jokingly, most seriously} were: 

"Smother Me" by The Used

"Heaven Can Wait" {acoustic version} by We The Kings

"You Shine" by The Morning Of

"Te Quiero" by Belinda y Otros

I am sure that there were others that I just can't think of anymore. I love dancing with my husband though. And I love when he sings cute songs to me. :] Random side note: At Race's family reunions every year they have an awesome dance with square dancing and the two step and other cool dances like that. Last year while we were engaged we went to this and it was our first dance together and apparently someone asked Race's mom where we learned to dance. I guess they were impressed with our skills that I didn't even know we had. Well, more that Race has. Anyway, I felt really cool after that. And now I want Race to take dance classes with me somewhere. It'd be lots of fun! 

Now I'm listening to our wedding reception playlist. Good stuff. :]

Dear Boys Post

Elise's Pieces is doing this cute post where you write letters to boys. I'm not sure if I'm really allowed to participate since I'm married but I decided to do it anyway. I hope no one minds. It was just such a good idea that I couldn't pass it up.





Dear Brother on a Mission Boy,

Of all my brothers I miss you the most since you've been gone {don't tell the other two}. I cry sometimes because I miss having math and spanish classes with my genius brother and it makes me sad that you barely know my husband...you are doing an amazing thing though. Thank you for your example.

Love your sister, Emma

Dear 2 & 4 Year-Old Boys I'm Babysitting, 

You are stinking cute and I love how much you care for each other. It's also super cute when you give each other hugs and say "I'm sorry buddy." You two would make good big brothers to a little baby sister. {Hint hint to your mother!}

Love your babysitter, Emma

Dear Adorable Nephew Boys,

I can't wait to come visit you. I will come bearing gifts of cute itty bitty bow ties for you to wear to church. Get excited!

Love, Aunt Emma

Dear Little {and by little I mean younger, you surpassed me in height long ago} Brother Boy,

Girls are dumb sometimes even though we always complain about boys being dumb. I hope that when I call you and attempt to give you dating advice/listen to your woes that it doesn't bother you and helps at least a little bit. 

Dear Daddy-O Boy,

Thanks for your health advice and helping me not freak out. Thanks for calling and leaving cute messages on my phone. Thanks for going with me to the temple and then talking to me about it when we realized it was closed for cleaning. And thanks for taking me on a gazillion and one daddy-daughter dates when I visited for a week. Just because I got married doesn't mean I don't need time with my dad anymore.

Love your 'favorite' daughter, Emma

And finally,

Dear Husband Boy.

I'm gonna keep it simple: You make me so happy! 

Love your wifey, Emma