Tuesday, April 5, 2011

I like to write.

I have a cute little notebook {Target Clearance} that I carry around with me all the time. In it I write my down my random thoughts throughout the day. I started doing this a while back because I was not finding the time to write in my journal. It has quickly become something I love to do. I am not a good writer nor am I in any way eloquent with my words. But, writing has quickly become a release for me. Sometimes I just write random thoughts, sometimes I write letters to my family or my friends or my husband, and often I just write lists of random things. {Race pointed out to me that I LOVE to write lists for anything and everything} Anyway, today I wanted to share some of my thoughts from my 'journal/notebook' with my blogging friends. I have noticed that it is much easier for me to write things on paper than to try and figure out what to type up on my computer. I think that sometimes I type faster than I think and then end up going back and changing things over and over and over again. Or I read it over later and realize that what I wrote made no sense at all. Anyway, off topic again. Here is something from my mind. :]

PREFACE: Some of you have heard of or read some from the blog divorcedand20.blogspot.com. I was thinking about this blog when I started writing these thoughts the other day. I do not know the whole back story to this girl's life and I love her blog and how open she is about her thoughts and feelings. This post is not to try and say that I am better than her or Race is better than her ex. My thoughts are, more than anything, thoughts of gratitude for what Race and I have. So, here goes.

March 30, 2011
I stumbled upon a blog called Divorced & 21. It's about an LDS girl who got married (sealed in the temple) and then was divorced within just a few months. The blog is not actually about the divorce but more about her and learning to move on and live again after the divorce. {She is amazingly optimistic and I love to read her blog and hear about how she has coped and changed because of the trials that she has faced} It's made me think a lot about what is making mine and Race's marriage work...because it is not always easy. These are some of the things that we do but also things that I think we could do even better sometimes. {I am not saying these are the things that MAKE a marriage work for everyone or that these things were not happening in this blogger's marriage but they are things that I notice work for Race and I}.

1. We ALWAYS say "I love you."
2. We ALWAYS kiss "good morning" and "good night"
3. We know that neither of us can always "win" ALL the fights, discussions, or debates.
4. We "bend" for each other.
5. We serve each other.
6. We do not go to bed mad at each other, we stay up and talk it out (aka We communicate)
7. We have a good intimate life (kisses, cuddles, hugs....etc.)
8. Finally and possibly most important (or what causes everything above) is that we are both TRULY, FULLY COMMITTED to each other.

I am so grateful for my marriage and for Race. We definitely have hard times but I trust him 100% and know that he will never give up on me and I will never give up on him. I am grateful for every time Race kisses me or tells me he loves me. I am so grateful for everytime he tickles my back or legs. I love when he does the dishes for me or the laundry or straightens up the house. I love knowing that he would never talk bad about me to anyone. I need to always remember to be grateful for the small things he does. I need to always look at the good rather than focus on the bad. There are so many things to learn about how to make a marriage work and they are different for every marriage. I am learning more and more what works for Race and I and I will continue to use all of the things that I learn to make our marriage better and better.

That's all there is from my little journal entry post. I know that these are not even close to all of the things that make our marriage work, they are just the things that I was thinking about that day. I know that Race and I are still learning so much about each other and that we will ALWAYS be learning about each other. Marriage is not the easiest thing {at least for me} but it is most definitely worth it! I love Race and I really love being married to him!

P.S. Whenever I look at our wedding pictures I think of two pieces of advice I want to tell all engaged ladies:

1. LOVE your dress! Do not settle for something that you do not love.
2. LOVE your photographer.

These are two things that I notice every time I look at my photos {BESIDES the fact that Race and I are absolutely adorable} and I am so grateful that I did not get any of the other dresses that I looked at, partly because they were way expensive and partly because I really was not impressed with any of them. I wore my mom's dress just refurbished and it cost a grand total of about $70...I think. Every time I look at it I just love it more. The small details and the gorgeous lace...swoon! Anyway, now to the photography, I love the style of my photographer and I love how every single picture turned out. I love having these beautiful pictures hanging in my house and looking through them time and time again on my computer. I am sure that everyone would say something a little bit different but that's my little piece of advice if anyone is wondering.

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